Maladaptive Daydreaming and Social Anxiety: A Two-Way Street?

For those immersed in the world of maladaptive daydreaming, spending extensive hours lost in vivid fantasies often comes at the cost of a fulfilling social life causing a sense of alienation, shame and embarrassment.

It’s no stretch then, to imagine that the isolation caused by maladaptive daydreaming can eventually lead to feelings of discomfort in social situations. In more severe cases it may even lead to diagnosable social anxiety disorder.

But how strong is this link? Is it common for maladaptive daydreamers to suffer from social phobias?

Maladaptive Daydreaming and Social Anxiety: Exploring the relationship

Research has shown maladaptive daydreaming (MD) has a high degree of comorbidity with social anxiety disorder (SAD). Almost half (44%) of MD patients experienced a debilitating fear of social interaction.

Examining this link between MD and SAD offers valuable insights into how one becomes a maladaptive daydreamer, and also suggests a possible way out.

When any two factors are correlated, the important question is the nature of the relationship.

So does MD cause someone to become socially anxious, or does social anxiety lead to the development of MD?

As is often the case with mental health conditions, current research suggests that the relationship between maladaptive daydreaming and social anxiety disorder is a two-way street, with each condition worsening the symptoms of the other.

Let’s look at each aspect of the relationship in more detail.

Does Social Anxiety Cause Maladaptive Daydreaming?

A 2017 study by Somer and Herscu investigated the link between MD, SAD, and various other variables.

It was found, as expected, that social anxiety increased one’s risk of developing maladaptive daydreaming.

Unlike historic risk factors such as past trauma, experiencing social anxiety currently was found to predict maladaptive daydreaming.

This fits with accounts taken from maladaptive daydreamers in an earlier study, who report that the presence of other people makes maladaptive daydreaming impossible.

Social anxiety therefore seems to create the perfect breeding ground for MD. Fear of social situations naturally leads to withdrawal and isolation, affording one the time and opportunity to daydream.

It also produces stress and dissatisfaction with life, making one more likely to turn to strategies such as MD to cope.

It’s worth noting that social anxiety is not considered the only route by which MD can develop, nor is it sufficient criteria by itself.

To develop maladaptive daydreaming, a person also needs the capacity for vivid imagination and absorption in dissociative experiences that make such intense, addictive daydreams possible.

Still, social anxiety appears to be an important risk factor for the development of MD.

Can Maladaptive Daydreaming Lead to Social Anxiety?

As mentioned above, social anxiety isn’t the only way a person can develop maladaptive daydreaming.

So let’s say someone develops the condition through another route.

How might this daydreaming compulsion increase their risk of social anxiety? There are a couple of possibilities:

Shame

Research has observed a strong link between MD and shame—individuals who spend hours engaged in fantasy daydreams may feel ashamed of the content of their dreams and their inability to control their thoughts.

Shame is also a key factor in social anxiety, as it leads to low self-esteem and motivates one to hide away from the scrutiny of others.

Fear of discovery

As well as producing feelings of shame, maladaptive daydreaming may create anxiety around the possibility of your private daydreaming habits being exposed before other people.

This would prompt a person with MD to fear being in the spotlight and to spend as little time as possible with other people.

Impaired social skills

One of the tricky things about social anxiety is that it self-perpetuates: fear of social situations leads to avoiding them, which leads to your social skills (making eye contact, holding a conversation, etc.) getting rusty.

Being out of practice in social settings may lead you to get a less positive reaction from other people, making you even more afraid to mix with others.

Since MD steals so much time away from other important aspects of life, it may lead to you becoming so detached from other people that it becomes much harder to engage with them even when you want to.

Treating Maladaptive Daydreaming and Social Anxiety Together

The fact that a thriving imaginary life and real life cannot coexist is one of the main reasons MD is so distressing. But it also suggests a possible form of treatment.

Exposure Therapy

Social anxiety is treated through a process called Exposure Therapy, in which patients are asked to confront the situations they find frightening.

In doing so, they learn that other people aren’t nearly as frightening as they expect while also getting to practice those long-dormant social skills, gradually building up proficiency and confidence.

The same technique could be effective in helping people living with MD, via a slightly different route.

Filling your schedule with as much social interaction as possible essentially makes daydreaming impossible, since daydreaming requires isolation.

Over time, the urge to daydream should gradually subside if inhibited in this way.

Some people may find it difficult to maintain the discipline to socialize, especially if it induces anxiety. In that case, you could use platforms such as BetterHelp or Headway to find a therapist who can keep you accountable.

Keeping Busy

Furthermore, daydreaming only becomes maladaptive when it is used excessively as a coping mechanism in response to distress.

Doing your best to engage with the world around you, staying in contact with loved ones, and keeping busy with fun social activities should, hopefully, reduce the distress and unhappiness you experience.

Without distress, the need to use MD as a coping mechanism disappears.

So while “you just need to get out more” is hardly a helpful or comprehensive answer to the problem of maladaptive daydreaming, perhaps there is some truth to it.